Tag Archive | mother mary

Ancient Mother…

I’m not all elegant like the Goddess people. And I’m not all that sophisticated. Sophisticate. Sophie. Sophie the Original Mother…or one of them anyways. Quite a few Primordial Mothers out there really. I get it. Each time span…..thought of their life as the first….thus they wrote about it like that. Unless of course things were channeled back then too….which isn’t all that crazy considering they experienced burning bushes and booming voices from the sky. All signs of psychedelics. Reworking the brain. Cycle after cycle…eon after eon….until you’ve cycled through and or…figured it out and won the golden ticket. No, you don’t need the psychedelics….but you’ll surely need to stimulate your internal ones if you don’t want to take any. I was not under the influence of any outside medicines or stimulus when I received a CALL from God. Yikes. How embarrassing in this age of the microscope. It’s really not that big of a deal. He Calls on people all the time. IN fact, this wouldn’t be my first. It would be my 3rd. I gracefully and hilariously heeded those calls…and even this one at first. I did it…..then I removed it as if it never happened and I crawled inside a clam shell. I didn’t understand it. It was a surging. A passion that stirred me to swirly swirls and giddiness. A Mother. A Mother? There’s a Mother God? Truth be told….I’ve been whispering those words under my breath for six months now. And I believe they(Heavenly representatives)…. want me to represent Her?


But why? Since that time….I’ve learned there are many many women Called by The Mother. I tell myself there are so many…surely they don’t need me. Then I remind myself that I am the only me available, and possibly….my me-ness can open eyes where anothers can’t. What am I opening your eyes to? The Mother! The feminine. The idea that there is a difference….and it’s there for a reason!!! I also look at their choice of me…I didn’t get to raise either of my human children…yet I was still required to understand mothering, so God gave me animals. Goats. Oodles and oodles of goats. Along with birds, sheep, cows, horses, cats, and dogs. Nocturnal too…I carried a tiny sugar glider in my pocket for years like a kangaroo mama.  I learned every phase of life and every phase of mothering. Even the sacrifice of the lamb. She was dying and I couldn’t let her suffer. Middle of the night. The only tool available to end her suffering was my two tiny hands. Love. Mother Love. I already knew the biggest mother lesson. You sacrifice for them to have better. And that was a sacrifice because the vision is now in my heart… of the silencing of the lamb.


The Mother is resurging. Having a renaissance to pull Herself up from the chained treasure chest at the bottom of the seas. SHE is calling us. Pulsing through our bodies with sacred love. It’s a need. An ache. Mother. Mother. Mother may I? May I allow my childmind to curl up in your arms and sleep? May I rest in you? May I wake in you? May I feel your fire pulsing and pull it into me? May I tend the ache and stir the ashes….build the flame? Rise the passions within me so I can blow a gentle breeze under the wings of others? Remind them all that there is a feminine? That there IS another side. Deny all they want, but it only hurts and never helps. How can you balance the masculine and the feminine within you….if you don’t hold honor or respect or faith in the feminine? If there is honor, respect or faith in the masculine…then there must be honor, respect and faith in the feminine. That’s how you balance. A one sided scale is….broken. YES…it’s broken!!! You see, I understand it now. I understand the point. It took me a full half year to find the point. Research, study, quandary, questioning, seeking, asking, sorting, meditating, praying, demanding, screaming, indifference(for 2 seconds), and complete rehash on the mind seesaw. Tears, anger, fear, embarrassment, goofiness…..I felt all of these. In the end, it’s a simple request being asked of me, and others. What and how we go about this request…is the fun challenge for each to determine. When I first had this CALL, I was thrilled and giddy with excitement. What fun I could have teaching the world the goodness and juiciness of the women they’ve been overlooking and walking on for ages. How they could change the planet into utopia…if only they utilized their precious gems in the right fashion.(gems being the human minds and hearts).  If they cherished and expanded the worth and role of the feminine in all areas of creation and life…all would quickly see that the design is flawless….male AND female. It’s the players who can’t see all sides of the facets…that had doomed creation into a lopsided mess.


So here I am. Here we all are. Some are Goddesses. Some are Priestesses. I am neither. I am the Mother. Crone version. I always saw myself in white flowy gowns with flower wreaths in my hair. My vision was off. I am………….a rainbowfied hippyfied crone mama wearing flowy color and sass. This is that big thing I was so scared of as a child! What’s to be scared of? This is me….telling you….there is a Mother God that has been written out of history!!!  I’m here to help write her back in. Told you I was here to save the world!!!  Haha….change it anyway! There….see? Done! Not so hard after all. So……………just call me Mama!  Haha…or Mamafeathers or MamaSheri or MamaWillow or Mama Pluma …..or Sunshine, Rose or Hope! As the world wakes to another Mothers Day…take a moment to think. The Father? With no Mother? Who birthed us? I am woman. It is in my soul to say…masculine without feminine is imperfection…thus it is NOT GOD. Do yourself a favor on this special day…look into it. Search out the ancient mother. Find her in all her glory. All HER many names. Nammu, Isis, Sophia, Ashera, Inanna, Hathor, The Holy Spirit, and probably maybe 50 more names…last but not least being Mary. Mother Mary. Many names…same energy. Same milk. Same tits. Same Love. Mary Mary quite contrary…how does your garden grow? With syrups and thorns and drops and storms. WILD. Wild woman…wild mother…wild child. Rewild…it does a body good. That….or Mothers Milk but you’d have to uncover a tit for that.


 oh…don’t go there

  • We can ignore it. We can dig a hole in the sand and stick our  heads in it. We can wear rose colored glasses or shades so dark and thick we can’t see nothin. We can swat it away like a fly, but negative energy is real and it’s out there. It’s in here too. What to do with it? The governments really are trying to kill us slowly. If we were all healthy and happy all the time, where would be the need for governance? If joy was the meal of the day our bodies and minds would thrive and rise and this would rise everything around it. The word economy would be eradicated.  E  con  o  my. Oh my is right. Everything is a con from the fabric to the rubber to the poison food. They poison us so we need doctors and they give us poison medicines to keep us needing the doctors. A circle. Sick. Who can fight when they’re sick? I can’t reiterate this enough. We are being poisoned via the sky(chemtrails), the ground, (GMO’s) the water (fluoride and who knows what) and the mind(tv). But that’s not enough, they also poison through the schools now too. Have you seen the commoncore? Ya, what’s common is it’s rotten to the core. They take a simple mathematical problem and send you to the moon and back for an answer when the answer is sitting right there. Why? Because the only thing real….the only thing that is absolute….absolute true…is math. Sacred Geometry. The ONLY truth. They desire dumb humans who won’t fight back. Who won’t care. Sluggish beings. Eh. No biggie. They feed us the word conspiracy theory as a means of playing the game of the peanut and the shell. Right now….there is the world series of….peanut and the shell. I got your fuckin peanut boys!!!


I am a human of high emotion. High ups and high downs….and high indignations as well. To me, life is one big huge indignation right now. I’m like this little bug trying to hold onto my rope and stuff….got a job to do….and the wind is blowing me….its whipping me…………..I can see the dudes face…huge……lips puckered……blowing lies and icks and pains….I’m trying to hang on, keep my rope and my tools AND reach the top. What good is it to reach the summit if I don’t have my tools still? That would leave me at the summit alone. The tools my friends, are so we can get you up that mountain too! So let’s get real here. Negative emotion. It ain’t just sadness folks. And it ain’t just fear of what the bad guys are doing or gonna do to us. Oh no. It’s evil. Evil lives inside us. That’s where the devil is. LIVED. DEVIL. LIVED. One of the greats in the plant kingdom taught me this lesson. Ayahuasca. Grandmother Aya taught me that my mind, and what I was allowing it to do….was worse than any abuser, terrorist, killer, wife beater…could ever be. Me and my shadow. My shadow is mean to me. Cruel beyond words. She used to slay me daily, then God would repaint me and I’d stand to be slain again. But it goes much further than that.


My shadow is jealous. My shadow sees another do what I’ve struggled to do for years…….and do so effortlessly and with panache and style….and she berates me. She squeezes precious tears from me until I…..I, can right myself and correct her. She wants to say…it’s not fair….like she’s done so many times throughout her life, but no…..wisdom is her friend and she reminds herself that life is not about fair. Life is about LIFE! COLOR! SPLASH! TOUCH! HEART! And mine is mine and theirs is theirs! Nothing wrong with mine. The more I like mine, the less I want theirs. The more joy I find with what I already have in my life….the less I need of what’s in others lives. I am fulfilled. I am infused with joy. An elixir of joy is inside each and every cell in my body and it’s also in the protons surrounding me. We, I walk in beauty. Do you see? Do you see that it is that 360 degree sphere perception that changes the reflection? Like a finger dipped into the pool of water. Over and over. Each dip of the finger, causes a ripple. How hard did the finger dip? How fast? What was the water doing when the finger dipped? All of these things affect the ripple size and depth and color and and and…..as well as…perspective and perception. Oh the lovely pers. Persnickety. Do you see that we can change our perspective in a nano second? I do it effortlessly now. Midstream in my thoughts or sentences and I know….I’ve put the sentence together wrong…………it will create negative. SHIFT. Switch.


Ok….well, I have barely covered a tiny bit of the word that is negativeEnergy. Ya….its thrown together so often it may as well be one word. Same for the positive. Hey, yo. Middle, middle right, middle left. Also viable and also useful. If you don’t know the depths of the pool…….you don’t know how far you can swim…or what’s down there hiding in a treasure chest tied with rusted chains!!! If you don’t know the tippy top of love……then you only know a crumb. Here’s another negative nancy for ya. The fear of not being enough. Enough for who? Enough for what? My shadow sees other peoples words these days and says to me………..see, those are good words. Worthy words. People read those words. Oh look, they are sharing the words as well…they really like them. Oh yes, they’re helping me too, those words, so yes…I’ll share them too! Oh goodness, the people really need to hear those words. Not my words. No. Mine are written differently, not in the right first person or right flow or right need for the people, because nobody reads mine. Should I stop? Should I bother? Am I making a difference? Am I helping? Should I stop? Should I stop? Signing off in Costa Rica where I am preparing my art for an event…yup I am…..where communities are springing up everywhere like daisies and the majority of HUman sounds are negative to my ears and Spirit sounds are positive. Ahhh, the battery of silence. Oh…and what to do with negativeEnergy? Reverse the poles if you can…if you can’t…MOVE! Oh, haha, and throw some violet flame on it to transform it!!!

PS….It’s a real question. Is there a point to these writings? Anyone getting some kinda help from them? If not, I’ll just stop. Free up my time. Tinker with a book. This is the little girl inside….asking you guys for your help…..what she’s really asking is……can I really sing or have people been lying to me my whole life? I am so strong now, and I can take the truth even if it comes as a punch. I want an honest answer please. Please. Do I help? Or are they pretty words…


the Mary thing…

Where’s the reaction? I said I was Jesus!!! I said I was Mary! I said Jesus was a woman and that God was a Mother!!!  I guess people just think of me as that dumb old woman. Dumb old depressed woman…..don’t pay her no mind. Story of my life. It’s ok though, I am strong. Life built me like a candle, layer by layer, into the heat. Alone. People are Called to Duty all the time. Called to the Ministry. Called to be a Dr. Well, I was called to help the world. I wasn’t called alone, but I was called. I’m working like all others like me, in the dark with only my light or candlelight. I guess we’re like the janitor. Nobody pays him no mind, yet he’s always busy busy busy. Like I was saying, I’m not sure if there will be a big huge second coming with Jesus floating in on a cloud…..dunno. I kinda doubt it though folks. Not with the playing board all decked out like this. Makes no sense. We, these people, are here for a reason. Besides………..the message you’ve all missed……………they wanted us to miss……..is that Jesus was human. Just a man. Just a woman. Doesn’t matter. Flesh and blood. It was flesh and blood that did those miracles. Every single thing that is called a Miracle……….was done by a hu man. The message was that we can all live in that way……but the message was diverted. Changed into a sin death die for you thing where the people live in fear of a menacing scary god and fear the big bad hell. That pisses me off like you have no idea. I’ve been railing at the friggin Vatican for years and years. Get me in there!!!!!!!! Get me in there to see all the truth they stashed there so you, we, wouldn’t know. But see, they train us from birth, to not know. TO NOT know we can do things. We are shamed if we believe we are special or have special abilities. Ridiculed. How can miracles grow in that manure?????? Haha….like a rose! Or a whoopsyDaisy…some things just can…against all odds. Are you a miracle growin in the manure?

I’m a multipurpose woman. That’s why MY message is threefold. The Mary thing-.which is the feminine thing. The Jesus thing. And, the God woman Mother thing. Yup. 3. My life deals in 3’s. But seriously folks…….these 3 things could change everything. Change the world. Change YOUR world. If only there was a country in chaos, that would consent to try. If only. I saw the oddest thing today that just screamed at me. It was Taiwan. Apparently the women there aren’t going to church. So the government had a new church commissioned that is a giant shoe. That’s what women are about, right? Shoes? And then, they say they’ll mostly use it for weddings. Archaic male debt system that has either you or your parents strained and stressed. For what? One day? Jeeze!!! The solution is a $20 dress and buy an icecream cone. Save your money for life!!! Ok…anyway…so. Why aren’t the women going to church? Hmmm. Could it be they are dissatisfied with the male doctrine??? Could it be they are dissatisfied with the male church??? Could it be they seek real meaning in themselves and their families and lives? A purpose other than the 9-5 old traditional way of being???? People are seeking more. Demanding more. Tired of the shallow, we want deep roots. Not just that…but deep mother roots. If this weren’t true, AMMA wouldn’t be hugging 20,000-50,000 a day. People wouldn’t have that need. But they do. I don’t know that I’m here to be an Amma Hugger. I think I’m more of a talker. A voice. I was told today that my wisdom was like water for a thirst. Most people don’t bother to listen to the elderly, the ones who have all the experience. Nope….shut up in nursing homes. All that wisdom. And me personally? My life was a smorgasboard……….so I would have a gazillion pieces of knowledge and experience. Tiny pieces….but hey, tiny matters. You ever put salt in your tea? Signing off in Quebradas Costa Rica where the locals genuinely express, it hasn’t rained in days and the taxis are duking it out. Oh, and….nevermind.



heart lessons….as fast as I can

While I was under the blanket, sliding down walls and thinking thoughts, I was also feeling alive. Have you ever noticed that it’s when we are in times of trouble or stress or sadness or grief….these are our alive times. We Feel everything. When it’s just joy…I know I know….it should never be Just Joy…but when it is joy or happiness or giddiness or gratefulness…any of the quote positive emotions, we really aren’t doing much thinking…much analyzing. Much thinking or learning about who we are. As I sit in my imaginary wall slunk position, I contemplate everything. Life…death….how did I get here? Who am I? Who do I wanna be if not her? We ponder. We dig. We rarely dig when in joy. No…joy is just that. Joy. The completion of feelings to their culmination. Satisfaction. Joy. Ending to a thing, that has produced good feelings in the belly. When we are in the throes, the belly is in full active use….aching, needing, wanting, hating, crying, heaving. All belly things. I guess that’s why the belly is the yellow chakra. The solar plexus. The warrior in us, the wisdom, the self respect. Hmmm, does joy have a chakra? No, I don’t believe so. Joy is also felt in the belly, but it’s fleeting….cuz joy is fleeting. Quick. A transient emotion that is rather elusive and somewhat rare. I have felt it a lot in the past 14 years. Beyond that…a few times…births. That’s about it. But solar plexus emotions…wowza…familiar I am. I learned tonight that I am, part of what we are supposed to be doing….what I’m supposed to be doing, is to understand myself. Hmmm. I already do that. I analyze most if not all of my thoughts. Apparently not all, or I would be further along. Oh, I also learned that to wish or crave to be…further along, which I tend to do…is to discredit the me now. See….there’s that now again. Man, it sure pops up everywhere. My constant wish to be further enlightened…discredits the phase of enlightenment that I am NOW, presently in. And whats wrong with this phase of knowing…understanding? Nothing, absolutely nothing. I just am in a hurry right now. Oooooh, I also read that if you are aware of an illness…you live longer than one who is unaware…cuz since you’re aware…you make changes. I am aware of my illness now and boy have I made changes!!! So….these things are presently on my mind….my mind….and the need for it….the sometimes wish for the silence of it…but ultimately, the gift of it….as well as the thoughts. Oh those thoughts. There are a gazillion each day. I was so blessed to watch/witness my brains process last night. It’s not an ordinary feat. Usually we are so caught up in the moment, in the misery or whatever emotion is happening….that we lose sight of what is happening inside the mind or the body. I was blessed with a full view…..like a mini movie and I got to help choose the outcome. I got to steer the outcome. I got to see the path and choose not to take it. Remarkable. Quite the learning lesson. So many things going on for me…whether they be thoughts or repercussions or outcomes of thoughts…..some important some not yet deemed unimportant…but should be. I’m in college now, spiritual college…..way past the 12 th grade…..yet….headed back to kindergarten. Simplicity. Recognize all thoughts as….thoughts that can be changed. Recognize all parts of self as necessary and important…even the so called negative ones. They are all part of me…part of you. They make us who we are each second of the day. They get us to turn left or right or have us stay straight and steady. Every thought…makes up who we are. Yay!!! Thoughts are fun! I learn. Night night. Sleep tight. 2:47am = 4 = Angels. Oh…they have left the building….taking a break and will arrive at the new homes on Sunday. Don’t forget! May they bless you as much as you need blessed. Amen. Ps….My mug broke. My favorite mug…of which there are 2 identical….was broken with complete careless-ness. I was removing my bed pillow leany thing and could feel the careless-ness in my hands…in my body…felt the brokenness of something about to be. Oh no! My mug. I wanted to cry. In the end, I simply remade the chamomile tea and put it in a different mug. A completely different mug. As I sit here and drink it, I realeyes, it is the same chamomile tea…just the vessel is different. Is that what happens when we die? We stay the same and are put in a new vessel?….and we grow from there? Like part 2, 3, 4, etc in a movie???? I wonder these things. I like that I wonder these things.
I have new music again. Oh, still listen to Amma stuff, of course, but this is more generic…and what a soothing voice this man has. Krishna Das. Just love his music. Ye know, there are some mornings when I wake and I rush to open and read last nights blog portion. Sometimes my learnings come so fast and furious that I wonder how it translated with my words. Today was one of those days, but as usual…I like it and I don’t think it’s too hard to follow. I teach as I learn. Rather like the baby who touches the stove…learns that is hot and it causes ouch and don’t do it again……I am that baby, but I speak fluent English and I don’t just get the owie, I tell people about the owie and how it felt and how I feel about it now too. Hehe, all encompassing learning. Sorta full circle. But nevertheless…it is coming hard and fast for me now. Then again, I did wish it. Reminds me of my wish for enlightenment on that shooting star back in 2006. Boy did I get my wish that time! And I’m getting it now too. I asked it of Amma and I asked again to the Angels. I feel a hurry, an urgency…but then again, most people probably do who have been told they are dying. I’m not dying though. I am taking the reins of this dis-ease in my body. I do believe we have figured out the regimen, protocol. We haven’t fully calculated the price yet though. It certainly won’t be anything like the out of country fixes. This is a protocol of many different things at once. I may wait till after I am cured before I tell you what they all are….after all, I do have a bit of influence possibly and until I know for sure something works….I don’t wanna give it a ton of energy and have bunches of people taking it. Let’s just see what they do. Some go together like pie and ice cream and others are just selected for their own properties. My own…hopefully….personal cure. But like I said…if they work…I will share…of course. It feels good to have finally chosen. Finally decided. I have combined some you knew of and some you didn’t. An all around cure and when completed…I should be one healthy lady! And my lungs should be quite good again…..even though I abused them myself….I still can help them out….and they will help me, they are a part of me after all and our goal is to survive and thrive. Ok….many words today. Sorry sorta. :=))) Later Chickies and Roo’s!!! Signing off at YeeHaw Ranch. Ps…….There are a few people out there to whom I am ever so grateful. Thank YOU from my healing heart.












rough moments…..

Guess who has a bucket list now? Life is so funny. I just left 9 paintings in an unfinished building…with no paperwork or anything to say I did that. I just listened to my daughter say goodbye to her beloved dog Indigo, who she has had since he was a wee pup 14 years ago. I said goodbye to him myself. One way or another….tomorrow he will be existing on a pain free realm, full of vigor. God I love that dog. He lived with us for around 8 months then she came back for him and we didn’t wanna let him go. Broke our hearts. I love you Indigo. My doctor had news too. So…I now have 3 items on my bucketlist. Need more. Here’s the deal. I’ve had HepC for some years now but I do not give energy to illnesses these days. I ignore them. It worked. It slept. For some reason….hehe…cuz God says so, it has woken up. It has damaged my liver and the numbers are very high…in the millions if that means anything. She says….if I go to the GI doc and my liver isn’t too far gone….I can take an IV treatment that will kill the virus. If it is too far gone…hmmmm. ……………………………I was all for it till I just wrote these words. Hmmmm. No. It’s a vaccine. I hate vaccines and won’t give any to my animals…why would I take one???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? UGGGGH! Crap! DAMNIT! In the meantime….guess who is still an alcoholic? Guess who still drinks beer at night to get to sleep? Damnit…this is gonna take some doin. Peru might have to come before Costa Rica…but I wanna go to the Costa Rica when all of Summers family is going! They heard I was going! Shoot……I’ll sell so many paintings….I’ll be able to afford to do both! I’m so sick of LACK mentality! I suffer from it worse than my poor liver. So there. Have that universal grid! I will have enough money from the many and wonderfully high priced paintings! Hehe….sure hope the Gallery was for real! LOL…surely it was. Must be cuz my babies are there. But ya…I’m being positive and visualizing so ya….the gallery is real and the buyers are real and the money is real and it’s in my hands and I am in Peru and I am in Costa RICA baby!!!!! Helluva night folks…helluva night. I need to check on my daughter…my precious. Ok…night has done and gone. Talk to ya tomorrow. 2:36am = 11 = Master number. Master of what? We shall see. She said my body is using all it’s strength to keep me alive…thus my exhaustion. Blueberries to the rescue I hear. Yay. Night.

I’ve made the appointment for Wednesday with the GI Doc. I’ll do the sonogram and hear about the treatment and decide from there my plan of attack. It’s such a sad day here. Indigo was finally released from his suffering early this afternoon so we have mixed emotions. My poor baby…lost her baby. So very sad. I’ve been doing tiny loose end thingies all day. Heard from the gallery and have some paperwork now! Lol….!

As you all know….I’ve been getting my colored curls from Kai Mohair. I now have someone dying my own curls and the first samples arrived today. Just beautiful!!! And….it’s my Milky!!! I like that. I like knowing which goat is in the shawl or in the painting. I will still get some curls from Lisa, I’m sure! She has a treasure trove of colors! Well….we let the geese out today. Wasn’t easy…but they finally left. It was time…we hope. So protective of their tiny Miracle Johnny Five. Lots of hissing if you get anywhere near. Prayers for that little family! I worked on the white buffalo that you know nothing about…and also Mother Mary. Nearly finished!!! Nearly ready to show!

I’m not sure what to think of Doc’s words. There were quite a few. None good really. I finally said…so, oh gosh….my daughter was right? I’m dying? She said yes. But if the liver still has a chance…..then we would go for it. I’m not very trusting of western medicine so I’m not sure what I’ll do. It will be a process….I will let you know as I go. Tonight is NamasteFarms Blogtalk with Natalie Redding. The topic is Be More Successful! Boy….I need that! Man howdy do I need that. So….my positive vibes are on…my little girl freedoms are up and at’em and I feel good about things. It’lll all be ok. No matter what. If I don’t get healed…..I had a blast! If I do get healed….I’ll share so you or someone you love can too! Loving you guys. Signing off at YeeHaw Ranch. Oh…and I chickened out on telling my secret but if it looks like I’m losing the battle….I’ll go ahead and share. By then…it won’t matter what you think of me once I tell. Ya, it’s a helluva secret. Haha….and no…I’m not a man! Later gater.