An awful lot of wolf criers out there….beginning wayyyyyy back in 2012! Who thought that one up anyway??? Seriously…..if you had already counted to a million….why would you need to repeat it? Just so people one day in the future won’t think…oh shit….they stopped counting…..the world must be coming to an end on that date!!! What should we do????? AHhhhh!!! Dec 21, 2012…..that was the start. When will be the finish? How much fear will we feel unnecessarily until something either calamitous or angelic does occur? I think the cincher this time is the 4 blood moons. So why am I following it? Why am I letting it dictate my world? Why have I changed my flight date so I won’t be in the states on Sept 28? Well……I’ll tell ya. I could very easily have flown home yesterday as was planned. But as my mind ponders it…..I see the mushrooms. God…..Spirit……gave me the mushrooms. No question. Why? A gift for sure….but possibly more? Could it be something to occupy me……..something that takes every ounce of my focus? Could it be a time killer? What was its design? Ahhh…or to keep me outside during the photon deluge? TO have me breathing them? All I know is, I am still here. I’m not in Texas, dry dry hot hot Texas. Mushroomless Texas. Not only am I here….but I sometimes go searching them out 3 times a day….1-2 hours each!!! And in the rain!!! If it’s raining……I grab my umbrella and out I fly! Seriously folks. I know it’s rainy season, but have you stopped to think about this? Why are there SO DANG MANY mushrooms here? ON this one acre or so????? How blessed am I? Is there another place in CostaRica…….that has this many different species of mushrooms….that isn’t in RAW jungle…which I’m afraid to go in….unless I see a mushroom of course….then my fear stays and I courage through it. Courage. Hmmm. Cour (Coeur) heart(FRENCH)……Rage…..feel or express anger…..anger is fear. So….courage is… hearting through the fear!!! Haha. But to be honest……I’m much braver if someone is around. Today I wanted to step off the yoga platform so badly. I could see some. I told myself there were plenty without going there.
When I first arrived and was being bit up by the mosquitos….they told me that after a few months, I’d build up a tolerance and they wouldn’t bite me. Well…..6 months later, maybe a few have stopped biting. And….I’ve decided that sand fleas are worse. Way worse. Not sure where the ant bites fit in….and now……oh Lordie…..now it’s the plants. Remember those spiky trees I showed you? I told you not to grab trees to steady yourself when in the jungle????? Well………same with plants!!! They too are carrying loaded weapons. Jeeze. So….while my body was digesting and absorbing the Kambo frog venom and the rape` powder, it seemed that more was required. I was then bit by a mystery bug on my hand which swelled, and was bit by plants on the same finger…2 days apart. Yup…..2 sting holes from plant venom. That’s a helluva lot of venom for one little rainbow feathered mama. And the bugs. Haha!!! The bugs are amazing…..and they all seem to know about me and are now photobombing me. I love it!!! Today I had a butterfly let me take as many photos as I wanted until I got too close….3 inches was apparently his boundary!!! I didn’t get that shot! I did however…..witness the near birth of a spectacular version of cicada. They were born before I arrived. They were apparently encased in pods attached to a tree. They broke free from the pods to be born….then I found them. There are 5. A whole family, with bright red eyes. I check on them daily….scared one but he found his way back. I have an excess……a huge one……of photos. What to do with all these mushroom photos? Butterfly photos? I’ve pretty much stopped seeing the flowers….sorta. My eyes are zeroing in wayyyyyyyy deep. Folks….I am seeing mushrooms…………….oh……..smaller than these period dots I love to use so much……………….! Isn’t there a call for that somewhere???? A need??? I wear trifocals…..thus…..i have closeup lenses! But trust me….without the passion……I wouldn’t find half or more. Shoot….I wouldn’t find any technically cuz without the passion….I wouldn’t be out there looking! I’d be sitting inside……as usual. Todays tally: 2 photobombs and one sit still for portrait.
I read an article today about the cotton clothes we wear…possibly not coming from cotton, but a byproduct cotton-like substance acquired from trees. Rainforest trees too. After reading that, my curiosity has been aroused……where is all the cotton being grown to satisfy the 7 billion people? Oh dear. Being awake….sometimes makes you want to go back to sleep. Is it possible I am wearing the rainforest? Right now? Global empathy is growing in me. I feel the ick in my being on a regular basis now. Love is so thick. Lack of love is empty stick shacks…….shielding nothing…blocking the view. Haha…really. Is GOD keeping me occupied???? Is he shielding me? As I rise in consciousness and the layers of love thicken, deepen……is He distracting me from excess pain? Or is there a more tangible reason for this massive new passion so big that it’s really hard to swallow at times. A lump. Pure joy and giddiness….that kinda lump. Hmmmm…..I am becoming a child again….I must be Rising. Ooooooh…..and then there’s that! The choosing of a belief system. Mine is that I’m rising…..ascending……in the spiritual sense, not physical that I know of…..and, within that same system, in order to achieve said ascension, I must remove all beliefs. How does one live beliefless??? One would have to be a willow tree……certainly not a frail leaf litter mushroom, which would be crushed with one drop of rain. Yup….strong and bendy would rule that outcome. So is that the solution? Go ahead and finish off this life and then request to be a WILLOW TREE next go round??? Haha! Finish out my karma as a bendy tree. Speaking of karma……..I haven’t done a session with Rhonda this week. I think I avoided it…..as any little child would, when feeling overwhelmed….and I have been feeling overwhelmed. Money mostly, but It’ll be ok. Ok yes…great, no. It mars things. I was at the ocean yesterday. The cheaper route to achieve something necessary……..and I went along cuz I’d see the ocean and it would only cost a few dollars bus fare. Hostels are really cheap. In the end…..I didn’t take a single photo of the ocean. I did get to O’honopono for her though. And….I’d been thinking of Natalie’s abalone colored curls and was gifted with a few tiny pieces of abalone. Yesterday was the 3rd day in the 3 days off, 5 on of ayahuasca spoons. I decided to make it 4. No ceremony today. On the other hand…it feels as if I have ceremony every day when I’m out finding the baby mushrooms being born. OH…..and I know why AYA isn’t talking to me anymore!!! Nothing I’ve done! IF she had kept talking to me….I wouldn’t have reached my higherself’s guidance. I wouldn’t be able to do what I’m doing with Rhonda. I realeyes’d that last night and it was a huge relief. That means, that for me…no amount of aya will bring her back. I get it now. Not that Aya can’t do other things….and she is…daily, I’m sure…..I’m just no longer aware. Oh dear….maybe SHE was the entity we cast out! Oh dear. :=)))) Well then….on that note…it is time to sign off….sitting on my bed in the little cabina, listening to the hard rain hit the banana leaves…..KNOWING that it is birthing new babies with each drop……listening for the sound of feet on the gravel which would mean my baby girl is back from the trip I am already home from……as I scratch sandflea bitten ankles raw and hit my glass pipe whild saying…………from Quebradas, CostaRica…..home of the tiniest lizards in the world….and the best forest mushies. OH, PS…..I’m learning…….I think we have ONE reishi mushroom!!! Catch ya nigh, dragonfly!!! Oh heck! Sorry…..but I just realeyes’d! Without the ants…..there would be so few mushrooms….wow. A humble lesson. Thank you ant for biting me and giving me your medicine. Aho.