spoiled gringo girl….!

I didn’t realeyes how spoiled I was. I had AM, but need to shift it. Don’t wanna be a spoiled gringo. Haha….I am reacting to the un-airconditioned hotel we are in for tonight and maybe tomorrow. I’m gonna go ahead and guess that the retreat has none either. I cannot let discomfort rule me. During the trip….I was reading. Spiritual reading. It was unexpectedly explained to me that the reason we are here….on planet earth, is to experience being US. Kinda knew that…but not the twist I just got. Experience US, without wanting to change us. Just learn to be Sheri, with all her quirks and misgivings, fears, jealousies and just plain ole lack of drive. Not try to better myself???? I thought that was a very strange thing…..but what they’re saying is that if I can live that way……learning and liking Sheri in all her idiosyncrasies. All her/my Imperfections. Well, then change would naturally occur and I would indeed be bettering myself!!! Well…….I need to work on this spoiledness. Blonde. I feel like a blonde. Haha. You wouldn’t know it….but I am a blonde. Was my entire life until old age took the light right out of my hair and turned it brown. Musta been the heart shift, eh? My heart was turning to the light…..haha….ya I’m goooofy.

It was quite a trip…all of it. Apparently 2 hippytype women, with all their multitudes of luggage, and layers of clothing……well, let’s just say I was a prime suspect. Both times…..they ran stuff over my hands looking for residues. Haha….what, I look like I cook meth or something? Had plenty of ganja particles on me though…..but I cleared both times. We should’ve taken photos. I had a very large purple case, a medium purple case full of fiber and herbs, a small carry on purple case, a basket which had my purse inside and a small foam and small amount of fiber, lol, ya right, stuffed large ziplock is more honest. Then………a twin blanket, my pillow, with 12×20 or so piece of felting foam, a shawl and a cape. I was wearing a complete set of longjohns too. Let’s just say I not only looked quite ridiculous, but movements were not easy and I got way overheated many times. The Orlando stop was 12 hours long…wow. Yuk. Our choice of spots to Live In for the night….while somewhat secluded, was bright light. And the dang message to not bring liquids, gels or aerosols into the airport….on repeat play….every 15 minutes, loud. Let’s just say I didn’t sleep. No pot, no sleepytea. I did get a half hour or hour today on the flight here though. Summer kinda scared me at the last minute with all her sketchy warnings of discomfort during immigration…..but it was no biggie. Then we were met by the shuttle driver for the 3 hour plus drive, due to landslide reroute traffic. 

Ok. So. We are here. In the hot hotel. Got wifi…..but don’t know how much I’ll have it once we get to Awakening Soul. Thinkin they have it…..but there are rules. Ha. Lady here at the hotel desk said she once had a lady show up with plans to spend 4 months there….and called after 2 days wanting out. Too scheduly. Crap. Someone shoulda told me that. I don’t do schedules. I also am an artist, who stays up late and wakes up late and wish to remain SO! Oh Lordie……what have I gotten myself into??? I shall endeavor to be brave and open. Expansive even. Running on no sleep for 32 and more hours cuz I didn’t sleep well before I left. Praying and ya…..come on Sheri…..we got this!

How much have I told you about my reticence? If I’m stuck with the depressed mind, I’d rather not extend this life then. Also, do I really want to stay…..if I gotta have a bad experience? Ya, food…..or meds. Like for example……Summer squirted this new oil she was told to get a lot of for us to bring for us to take……..flax. A whole bunch and it tasted awful. Really? See, I’m not a happy player most of the time, earth player that is…….and food has a role with me. Food that I cannot stand the taste of though………that’s my meals now? Nah. I’ve told you guys. My life has been hard enough…it doesn’t need to be super extended long, like a battery. I dunno. These are my thoughts today. They may change next week….or they may not. There is an ALSO. ALSO….my daughter likes to do things her way and I wanna know when we swap? Like right now…..it’s 4:30 and it gets dark around 6. I wanna go now….to walk and find food. She has been stalling and stalling and now wants 20 more minutes. This type thing. Why does it matter? Dark. Strange country. Strange city. 2 women. Hmmmmm…..does that tell on me? Doesn’t even occur to her to be back before dark. She must not have had my past. I know I know……God is my companion traveler this time…..should be able to take care of things….but. BUT. 

 Ok……it was fine. Haha. I freak so easily. Scared of my own shadow practically……possibly brought on by a mean punching ex husband, but nonetheless, I gots fears. Ok….escalated by, not brought on. Can’t blame it all on him….had plenty of unrealistic fears before I met him. So……….we went walking. Then Summer asked a man where we might find frijoles and rice. Lol. Right across the street, the lil lady cooked what we wanted with what she had. I had beans and rice, scrambled eggs and salad. FOOD!!!! Yay! A young man sat down and ended up being our translator and teacher. The shuttle driver did some teachin too. But young dude….said he could help with anything we might need….so of course I said…mota? Lol….yes….he can help me find mota and would have taken us to his friends to smoke right then if I wasn’t a chicken about it being dark in a minute. Ha. So. Should be able to find some rather easily from what I googled. I’ve always found some when I go places. Jamaica, Puerto Rico and now….Costa! So silly. Scared of the dark in a new city….but not scared to ask for illegal mota! Go figure. Oh ya. NEED! Speaking of need……….whoa…lots of pain on the plane and airport and again here. Barometric pressure. MOTA! Hopefully tomorrow. Sleep may or may not come tonight. We shall see. This is all a highwire act for me. I’m keepin my balance so far! Later chickies! And Cameron! Signing off at Rudy’s Hotel, San Isidro, Costa Rica.

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