….Useless Stackable Paintings….

I don’t like this Sunday half blog. It feels weird and empty. But oh well. It’s cold again. In the 30’s, after a few days in the 70’s. Wormed Valey on Friday, and she ate yesterday but today she didn’t. Don’t know what to think about that. Finished the newest Owl painting and started on a fairy one. What a strange painting!!! It’s as if the fairy is flying straight up. Completely homemade though cuz I used my baby niece as the model. Ha…not sure it looks like her, but it’s a decent looking fairy so I’ll keep her. Now I’m working on the background and her wings. Not happy with them….so, I removed them and removed the painting and will work on the wings alone and see what I can do with them, then reattach. Jesse came home so very drunk last night, whiskey drunk. Tried to deny it but I ain’t no fool. He also basically quit the Ren job. He wouldn’t wake up Saturday morning, then didn’t go again today. There goes my IN. My connection. I’ve only been workin my ass off for weeks. I was so upset last night that I just kept going on the fairy, in case I never worked on it again… I went to bed at 5:30am. Then got up at 7:45 but the boy said he’d lost the job so go back to bed. I just woke him up and he now says he only said that to shut me up and he hasn’t necessarily lost the job. Hmmm. BUT….I get to drive him to the bar. The friggin bar. I’m a wee tad ticked off, eh? There’s more to this story but I’ll keep that part in the dark.

So, not only is it cold ouot…it’s rainy too. Not a hard rain, just the mist kind…that still gets everything wet….including goats. I saw this stuff today you spray on things to make them water repellent. Ha….GoatLady’s Goats posted it on FB, and it made me wonder too if I could spray it on the goats!!! What would it do to the fleece? How would it then wash? It wouldn’t??? Dang, sure sounded like a good idea. Oh….if only there was a way to protect the coats from…LIFE. Speaking of LIFE…whats up with Valey? She does appear pregnant. I’ve never had one not eat this far from birthing.

I feel weird. I feel like I’m wasting my time. All these paintings just keep stacking up and stacking up. What am I doing? I don’t want to stop but what am I doing???? Over and over and over, I paint. And they sit. Maybe my daughter had it right. When I’m dead, maybe then they’ll sell. Guess I’ll just keep building my legacy. I always thought words were my legacy. I even have a poem with that title. But no…now it seems it’s the paintings. The useless stackable paintings. I woke up rather angry with God. Feels like everytime it seems something good is coming my way…..it only seems that way. Like a fast one. Like God is playing fast ones with me. Then again….we been doin that dance forever. Which is why I woke up ticked off. Ah well. It is what it is. Ok…signing off at YeeHaw Ranch on a short blog Sunday. Later!!!









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