Four kitties sleepin on my bed. Watchin Christmas movies one after the other. Had two helpings of pumpkin pie….my treat du jour. Speaking of that…how bout a story du jour?. From age 7 – 17, I lived in Maryland in a 3 story house. A nice one. Every year, we would enter the Christmas caravan and decorate our house inside out and allow people to traipse through our house each night for weeks. We had 5, maybe even 7 Christmas trees. It was odd having the people walk through the house….no room untouched. My mom was a pro at putting the lights on and decorating. (which made it ironic when years later, she had to work….and was working at a christmas store, alongside of me). We usually went to dads Sears store where a photographer would take the family photo….sometimes it was up on the mountain. That was our yearly Christmas card. Every year, we each received our own ornament to save for our later lives. Christmas Eve, we were allowed to open one gift. Then bed. Whoever woke up first…made the noise…I had 3 sisters. We would then wake our parents up and would have to wait at the top of the stairs while mom and dad did their thing. Their thing meant……..turning on Christmas carols, heating water for coffee, tea, cocoa, turning the tree lights on and when they were finally ready they’d call us and it was a stampede down the stairs. All gifts were handed out but not opened. The piles would grow and grow but we couldn’t open any till they were all passed out. Then……one person at a time opened their gift. And they were good gifts too. And usually one doozey. One year it was a jukebox. Another, a bumper pool table………and my husband wonders why I want all out Christmas. By that I mean gifts, the meal, the wrapping paper, the smiles. Hmmmm, lol, and the frowns too. It’s all part of it. I’m fairly good at pretending to like something that I hate. Aren’t we all. Goodnight my friends. 1:46am = 11 = master number.
Well now. Very interesting. Last nights UNFIT for HUMAN CONSUMPTION blog……was at a near all time low. NEAR. What is interesting is that at 2am, I received a message from the person who led me to my first all time low…well, as a blogger that is. Don’t you find that fascinating? She would like to be friends again, but only if I keep it private and don’t blog about it. Well my friends….. I don’t play in the dark. I play in the light. Also….I am a blogger who writes about my day and my emotions and my state of mind. You all met me that way, including the person in question. What would cause you to want me to go to the dark and keep hush hush. Only secret santa type stuff and I already blogged about that. The timing is phenomenal. I kept asking Jesse last night….why would this be happening now of all times. Then I realized maybe it was a snap effect. To snap me out of my funk. I decided that in the Christmas spirit, I would give her another chance. But she then explained that I was not the only wounded party. That……………won’t cut it. I was devastated by betrayal and false promises. Forgiveness for that would require a sincere apology, an explanation of why…….and most important….an understanding of the difference between what was done to me……and a giggle from me months later upon realizing that the fleece she bought…was in the wrong bag so she got a different fleece, Hello????????? To compare the two is like comparing the space shuttle to a baby dove. I do not know if a friendship is possible at this point, but I do know……..being secretive and held back from speaking…..is not gonna happen. My Mea is in Florida for her daddy’s funeral. See……I talk about my friends here. Unless I’m trashing them, which I would never do…..they feel safe here. Colleen….my grieving friend….reads this blog and knows darn well I call her that. My friends are in the light….as am I. That’s the only way I deal. If you can handle that then perhaps there is a chance.
Ran to town real quick but the animal shelter was closed. Looking for a kitten for Jesse to call his own….one to move on with him when he is ready. Went out into the woods with Cathy earlier to look at branches. Goodness. This is not a quick fix…but at least I’m off my butt. It’s a step. A baby step, granted, but a step none the less. To ready any paintings….I’ve decided the best and easiest way is to go ahead and go use the feltloom. Which means, it will probably wait till after the holidays. In the meantime….who knows. I may start something new…maybe even something different than my norm. It’s a fresh new day. New days, new ways, new plays. I shall rise and dust myself off. I can do this. AND, I can do this well. I shall persevere and go strong. Yes….I shall paint tonight! Ahhh, what a difference a day makes. Told ya I needed some days to go by. So…………there we have it. The blog after the whining. Go figure. Signing off at YeeHaw Ranch. For any who are confused…….I’d have to find the title to the blog that would explain and I don’t feel like it. I just wanna eat dinner. Ha! Later.