So, Life exists when we don’t want it to and even when we do. Some
people want to end their lives and others want to extend theirs. How
do we account for that? How do we equalize the need? I wanted to die
for 38 years. Now, I don’t wanna die, and avoid it at all costs.
Isn’t that interesting? Some people want to live but don’t know how
to free themselves from the.…what people expect syndrome. Believe you
me…I am so far healed from that that I’ve come out the other side!!! I
do what I want, wear what I want and look how I want.
It’s late Saturday night, actually, Sunday. Honestly people, I’m doing
everything I can for Lovey. I decided in the end not to leave him
loose. I got Gandhi with Opti, Doc, and Moonee, and Lovey is
alone….here by my window. I was gonna leave him out, but I went to
give him the drench stuff…multi vitamins, in a water dish, he went to
town on it…but the pups wanted it too and I had to hold them back. I
finally decided that it was more important that he have free access to
that than to be free at night where he would probably just go hang out
over by Gandhi and the others and be houseless which started this
whole thing. So, I can freely let him out daily with no hassles from
anyone else I let out. If only he can stand the being alone. I went
out earlier to listen and he wasn’t crying. We shall see when I go out
in a minute for Blue ball night night session. At the moment, I have
two kitties in my lap, one is asleep, the other is taking a bath, you
know I hate that. I love how they are all getting along now…well,
except for Gypsy, but at least she’s not hissing the growl hiss
anymore. 😀 Well folks, it’s 1:24am, and time for this old gal to
say night night. Kitty kisses to you all.
This really large fluffy gray cat came to sit in my lap today. Haven’t
had that happen in jeesh, maybe 6 months? Yes, the Gyps sat with Mama
today. Yay! Lovey followed hubby around the yard today while he pulled
tall weeds and now I guess he’s tired, and is sleeping on the porch
right next to Geiser. I let Gandhi, Opti, Moonee and Doc out, but I
don’t even think he knows even though it’s been hours. He really seems
to like the drench water and drinks it eagerly. He’s still so weak,
anything can knock him down and getting up isn’t all that easy. He
gets to his knee, then gives a big push and he’s up. Tried letting him
in a few times but he just gets in the trash to eat tissues. 😀
Seriously folks, he’s been laying there with the pups for hours. Maybe
like the sheep, Emmett, who hangs with the cows, therefore he’s a cow
now…..maybe Lovey will become a Pup. 😀
When I said hubby was pulling tall weeds, I mean the tall ones
standing between the house and my line of sight to the front girls
pen. I can see the pen now!!! YeeHaw!!! If I had more shelters
there, I would move all the breeding girls back over, but I don’t, so
quit wishing Sheri. Besides, I can see them better when they’re in the
back, right out my bedroom window. I can see well enough to see if
anyone is pacing, or digging, or getting up and down, all signs of a
baby coming soon. Speaking of babies, I do believe I will be moving
Angel out today. His chance to breed is over, he either did or he
didn’t. Then I need to wait a few weeks, then put in a cleanup guy
real quick, then they can all be released and have free access to the
L field. They should be all bred by then, which means the Boys won’t
be hassling them at the fence. No, they’ll be hassling the other
girls, the front girls, who I am saving for a March forced rut. At
least that’s my goal. I really want this to work. To switch from
spring births to fall births. If it’s possible, by George, I’m gonna
Ok, all cuteness aside. I just went to take photos of the baby goat
laying with the puppies and the baby goat had wet himself. A few steps
from the grass, it was too much effort to get up. This is not good. My
nerves are frayed. Everytime I get sad, I stop myself………wrong energy
concentration. But I am sad. My precious little one is too weak to do
much of anything. It hurts me to see him like this. Hurts bad. I had
been able to withstand falling in love with him. My Kya had broken my
heart and I didn’t want to love another goat that much, so I resisted.
That first night he lived outside in a pen with Gandhi, when I heard
him crying as I approached with his bottle at 1am, that’s when it
happened. That’s the moment I fell in love with Lovey, like it or not.
He has my heart all wrapped around him, like a mohair blanket, tucked
in at the gaps, to keep him warm…..to touch every part of him.
Well, we just fed the little curl critters and Angel is partway out.
Jesse took him out of the pen, but didn’t catch him. We will wait and
see if he finds his way back to the boys gate. Either way, no big
deal. If he doesn’t, we can catch him tomorrow and load him into the
zenbuggy. Just need a timespan now….to differentiate between daddys.
Lovey stayed on the porch the whole time, instead of following me. As
I was opening the chain at the front girls pen, Georgia and her two
buds came running to me. Stayed right at my feet the whole time I
visited. So cute, and that cry of hers is SO distinctive, so high
pitched, so adorable. I gave them their food way further down so they
could eat in peace and when I left, they were very happy babies.
Everyone was happy, except the boys, who don’t get grain till bitter
winter….and probably poor Lovey. Well, he’s alive another day and I’m
grateful for that. I just gave him his shot in the muscle and his Vit E pills. He walks so slow now that we just carry him where we want him to be. No matter what happens……I am blessed by knowing and loving this little guy. I guess the pneumonia is back cuz the rattle doesn’t clear now, every breath a rattle. Sat with him long periods today cuz he can’t follow me. He’s not healing. I may set up the playpen so he can be with us tonight. So very sad. Sad I am. Signing off at YeeHaw Ranch.