I finally feel ‘’ back to normal ‘’. ‘’ Haha! I hate that word! Normal. Nothing is normal. Every single thing in the entire world that you can think of…..is relative. It all depends on circumstances surrounding it and since each person is completely unique, then there simply can be…..no normal. Ok, I am once again in alignment with myself and my highest good. That is all I need to ever seek. The rest will follow like dominoes in a line….or in a spiral or a snake. I’m really glad I freed my name. It removed a weight I didn’t realize I carried. But more than that, I’m just glad to have my mind back, performing as it should be. Course it’s only been a day, but it feels right. I just plain feel lighter, like I could just float right up out of this chair. Haha, this chair. Lol. I know, my words are dependant on the previous posts words, sorry, but I am a life evolving.
Don’t you see it, hear it in my words? Gosh, now back to life…..as I know it. Ya, I had decided to write a book. That was the THING I told you I was working on, and I did start it. Problem was, it was a boring how to, about angora goats. Nothing boring about me or my goats….and there was no fun inside it!!!!!, so, I nipped it in the bud. I still may write a book…..just not that book. It definitely falls into the category of what was I thinking, but then we know the answer…to fit in, to be one of the “goat breeders”, to be a success! What is success? My version is much different than most. Mine is……finding and feeling joy…..and giving and sharing joy. That is success. And if I have to do things the hard way here without money of my own, then so be it. I will get a model, I will put my pretties out for sale, when the time is right and my ducks are in a row.
I am doing something rare. I am listening to music. Ya, the tv is playing, but I’ve got earphones on and am listening to my Adele Cd. I bought it months ago….with the intentions of opening it the day I got into my new Violet 55 Chevy Stepside Pickup Truck……and driving away listening to my girl. I’ve held it wrappings and all, till tonight. I put it into my laptop and into my Itunes. I have been rock and rollin in my chair for at least an hour now!!! Not only that, but I also found it on Youtube and posted it on Facebook….few minutes later, I realize that I’m hearing both songs in my earphones. It was so cool, I have hit replay on the you tube every time it quits so I can experience it together. As I’ve truly been counting on listening to this album for the first time in the truck….it is fitting that I’m not hearing it in a “normal” manner. Lol I love it though…I can tell you that…..even with the other music in the background. I just discovered her. And I bought the album. I am now honestly hearing most of her songs for the first time. What a beautiful voice. God gift. Amazing. Rainbows and puppies…yeehaw. Most albums have a bunch of duds….but I haven’t heard one yet that hasn’t rocked me. I’m gonna have to say she’s my all time favorite artist…..only comparable to Janis Joplin.
Jesse, I love you. If you ever read this…I will always love you and I will always be grateful to you for helping me find a more outgoing side of myself…..and for making me watch that damned awards show where I saw Adele. You were a thorn in my side, but I am the rose my son, and I grow. You grow. And as a rose, I am quite used to thorns. Above the thorns however, is the blossom……the blossom of the individual, finding itself, finding it’s etheric food, it’s eternal munchies cure. It is always the hardest before the dawn. A song I now dedicate to you is…….Someone Like You. Disregard her intentions for the song…just listen to the words baby. I can never convey how much I love you…how much I did love you. You were my baby. We were a team. Then you were gone. I couldn’t come, they wouldn’t allow it. I couldn’t share, but I have loved you every second of your life. Even when we fought, I loved you every second. I wish nothing but the best for you. Don’t forget me. P.S., listen to the song when you read this. And when you hear Adele, think of me.
Set fire to the rain……. The passion…the agony…of sending fire to the rain. Every moment…every step you have taken…..brings you to Now. My passion in telling you these things is strong enough to churn my belly, churn it into tight tight cream. It is a fullness, an ache. That my dears, is Passion. When you have to speak, when you have to paint, have to create…need need need to create…..you are….setting Fire to the rain.
Still listening, but need to pull these earphones off. It’s 2:33am. Night night my loves!!!!
Lordie…big mistake today. Decided to let the 4 beautifuls out at the same time as Moonee, Gandhi and Lovey. Last time I did that was when Moonee was still stuck in the pen cuz he’d just arrived and Gandhi was challenged. Hadn’t happened before ever and I didn’t make the connection to Moonee until today. I noticed the goats were near the garden opening where the gate used to be, so I went out to steer them away if they came near. Twenty minutes later in 100 degree heat, Socrates noticed Moonee. At first it was just sniffing, then it progressed to mounting.Then it spread through the whole group except little Lovey. I said, oh heck and make the badooo cokooo call. All that netted me was Lovey. After grabbing a feed scoop full of feed, I lured a few more…by calling again and then running toward the house. I had to go in and grab a hook, and grabbed Davinci aound the horns. We waddled all the way to the pen, with the hook still connected. Darwin almost had to have the hook too. So unlike them. In the end…there is still one goat in the yard….Einstein. And he WILL get put up before I’m done. Nearly an hour in this heat, I was either standing or running. Won’t make that mistake again. Seems the boys are wanting to go into Rut early.
Well, I got him in, told ya I would. I’ve been thinking about this breed early idea. Actually, it can help with my lack of penspace. I think I’ll go ahead and move Moonee tomorrow, in with the Pretties. He is definitely ready. That way, he should be done by the time the new babies arrive from Washington, and I can put the 4 new ones in with the Pretties as planned. And when I remove him, I will put the next breeding group in the other pen next door to that. Yes, I could save time and put the 2nd group in the kidding pen now…but that may hamper Moonee’s business. Been there, done that. The actual kidding pen. I will also finagle a gate somehow to close off the garden and I can then use the yard as another breeding pen. Ya, it’s taking shape. Someday I hope to have many pens and many houses.
I’m hungry. Think I’ll close up shop now. Signing off at Curly Locks Ranch.