Every thought you have and every word you say, is an energy, a vibration. The vibration you send out is the vibration you get back. If you carry the vibration of illness, you get illness. If you carry the vibration of being a healer, you reverberate healing. The video I am listening to….is vibrating. Like static on a radio. Which reminds me… when I was about 13, I was in the hospital and they were using a machine to do an EMG. I don’t know how usual this is, but when they turned the electricity on, to zap my muscles, the machine picked up the frequency on the radio. It said….Gold records on the wall. ZZTop, I think.
I seem to be remembering my past a lot lately. All the astrology and posts along those lines and the solar flare stuff… it all suggests a cleansing of the past. Shoot, this old lady I’m listening to again, said the same thing. I’ve listened to about 6 of her videos tonight, from the new children, to Atlantis, God, How to live, etc. She is talking now. That’s what was playing when I said it was vibrating. It’s normal now, now that I don’t need to make my point because I’ve already made it. By the way…this Old Lady I’ve been referring to, is apparently quite renowned, not sure how I missed her before this. I feel like I’m harping, but this is such important stuff. It’s everything, really.
http://www.youtube.com/embed/_DSDkeAxaH4 And I am led to music by….The Vibe Tribe. How appropriate. And I’m dancing in my chair. Everything is moving so quickly and everything is saying the same thing. I feel like I’m in the Truman Show. Not realizing……. I evolve every day, every minute, every thought. Wow, what a song I’m listening to…ancient mystery schools….didn’t I say that? 13 years on the mystery school? 13 is a mystery number in itself. AND, 13 = 4. I will spare you what I did next. I danced with the number 4. Freely pressing, then spacing then pressing, at random amounts. I was sure that a beautiful picture would emerge, but alas… someone messaged me and the flow stopped aflowin! Too funny.
Well, seeing as tomorrow is July 4th, which is part of the point of the rainbow gatherings… I thought I’d tell you the story of the National Rainbow Gathering I went to in 2007. That year, it was in the Ozark Mountains of Arkansas. The other one was a Regional, in Florida, when I was hippynapped. After reading the story again, I realize it is quite long. Really good reading though and pretty awesome writing if I say so myself. But for those who are not into reading long stories, I will nutshell it for you, and will place the long original story at the end of this blog.
At the Gatherings, on the 4th, everybody is silent. 5 -20,000 people, silent. From wake up till the noon circle, all is silent. The children are dressed in fairy type costume, in silence…ya right….ok, childish whispers. It is adorable. After everyone makes it to the main circle, the people join hands, however they can and start to ommm. Beautiful is not good enough of a word to describe it. The vibration of the ommm, fills the forest, and fills us. When the prayers are done and the omming has stopped, the children come in a line of whimsical fairyness. When the children are spotted, the crowd cheers, the hands are separated and the celebrating begins. This happens every year on the 4th of July, in an anonymous state. Why anonymous? To try to keep the 6-up and the feds from finding out. Never works…they always know, they always come and they always harass. If it weren’t for the cops, I’d probably go more often. They use the gathering as practice for terrorists….and btw, they have the Rainbow Gathering listed as a terrorist group. Nutjobs.
Well, supposedly my son, Jesse, his name is Jesse…supposedly he is on his way now, being brought all the way to the house. My intentions are that this will go well and magically we will get along and have worthwhile conversations and respect.
The goats are hot. No messing with them on days like this. It’s just feed em and run, but I did check their waters to make sure none were hot. And that is the farm news for today. One more thing…. A reader told me last night she was concerned for me because I am so sad. I don’t feel sad at all, so I was stymied. If it’s the suicidal old stuff….I’m only bringing that up as a contrast. I DO NOT want to die. I AM NOT sad. I am overjoyed with life to the point of giddiness. Have been for years and it just keeps getting better and better!!! Now that we’ve cleared that up!!! 🙂 Hello and welcome..to The Phillipines. Not sure if I mentioned Sweden yet, if not…Hey Sweden!!! Okie Dokie….story comin up…. Signing off at Curly Locks Ranch.
P.S. 6-up and 7-up means COPS. Anytime they walk through the gathering, hollers of 6 or 7 up can be heard, all along the ways, like a say it pass it on thing.
Rainbow Gathering, Arkansas, 2007
Wanted to give the handicapped perspective, minus the wheelchair. My ailments are emphesema, 2nd stage as of 97, congenital muscle disease/pain weakness arms & legs, liver disease, oh ya, and let’s not forget the….”your body is in dying phase” that I heard my doctor say this February…..and multiple phobias/unreasonable/excessive fears.
To go or not to go, that was my question. I had acquired the gumption, but was lacking the wisdom. I asked for the only sign that I couldn’t question. A rainbow. He provided in front of my eyes as I asked. Oops, but what about the dog, should he go? Rainbow 2. Hubby comes home sayin he saw a double rainbow over backyard. (Mine were in front) I now understand the significance of his rainbows. I, and the dog were to go……………forward, hubby and dog were to go…….back. Hubby drove me and returned week later to get me.
After 9 hours of driving, we arrived at the Clarksville Wal-Mart. That was a blast…..all these funny dressed people passing each other, there would be this silent once over, then a smile, then sparkles in the eyes and a nod of recognition. In the parking lot and down the store aisles and hotel lobbies. All us new arrivals were headed into the site, it was around 11pm, Saturday night. We headed towards the site going up this spiral winding mountain and the further from the town, the darker it got. Then it began to rain. We decided that since we didn’t know how to find the kids, and it was muddy and raining and dark, we’d wait til morning.
We found a hotel, after a few more twinkling eyes and namaste’s, and I laid in bed wide awake, adrenaline raging for 8 hours. We headed back to the Fallsville site, but hubby thought we’d missed our turn & wanted to turn around. As he was, I see a whole camp load of 6 & 7 ups off the side of the road, so I made him pull up there. They weren’t friendly, but did tell us we were just shy of it. So, finally, there it is…no doubts. Hippy cars out the wazoo, crammed like sardines in the mud, all the way from the highway to the 6-up ROADBLOCK. I don’t know, 1, maybe 2 or 3 miles. We had food stuffs to donate, but people hitched a ride in the back of the truck anyways, as many as would fit…..to get to the roadblock.
We pull over at the roadblock & I, the shy one, boldly walk down to all those cops & request they let my hubby drive me to main gate, since I have very bad legs. (muscle disease) They asked if I had a placard, no, not in my husbands truck, but I have prescription drugs to prove it……NO CARS allowed unless proven handicapped!!!!! SO, I had to do a quick change of plans. There is no way I can deal with STEEP TWISTING hills, carrying way too much stuff(hubby was supposed to carry most), and deal with a partially socialized dog. I was really upset, as I threw stuff out of my bags that were either dog related or I now deemed too heavy, regardless of need.
Hubby felt so bad, but what could he do……go back up 3 miles..park, walk back to roadblock, then all the way in, then find kids, who knows where…..then walk back to truck, then drive 9 hours home to work in morning? I wouldn’t let him. Didn’t bring any of my canes cuz I thought walking sticks would be easy to come by. WRONG!
I throw on my 3 backpacks, tent and sleeping bag and cross over the great divide…the roadblock. When I asked if they could give me a ride down, they said no….liability. As I hobbled down down down, and all the 6 & 7 up cars passed me, I begged…promising I wouldn’t sue. Nope….they weren’t handicapped, but they could drive down! And what of all the hundreds of hippy cars that continued the sardine line all the way to main gate. Were they handicapped? Just trying to point out the hypocrisy.
A guy named Brian, looking for a redheaded guy named Ginger, saw me struggling and carried my heaviest bag. We were only on the road a few minutes when this group approaches us, on their way up. The man is holding a huge birdwing, turkey, I believe, and a sagewand. He says welcome home and when he learns this is our first gathering, he stops. He asked our names & that wasn’t such an easy question for me to answer. My birth name is Sheri. Eight years ago, God/Spirit/Creator started me on a spiritual journey that continues today, but he started out by giving me a new name……Rose. (A story few know…wildly fantastic, and rarely told) Very few people ever called me that though.
So, I tell him this, and that my daughter had given me a rainbow name in Ocala, of MamaWillow, but when I got home, the internet rainbows poo pooed it, I guess cuz it was my daughter who gave it. Anyway, A younger man in this group walks back towards us and says, ….Willow Rose……….so, the guy with the turkey wing says, yes, your new rainbow name is now…..WillowRose. Sounded great to me, til….(yes, I’m gonna jump ahead a wee tad)…I get to camp and tell the story, and they all start laughing, saying…that’s the baby’s name. (The toddler now traveling with the kids, whom I hadn’t met yet) So…..the remainder of the gathering, depending on my mood at the moment, if you asked my name, you got any of these: mama willow, willowrose, nobody, noname, just call me mama, Idunno, and even…pick a name, any name. As an aside, God/Spirit/Creator, sent me on a vision quest of sorts, during winter solstice. He ended that journey by giving me another new name to go with the first He/She had given…..Hope. Rose Hope. (A story few know…wildly fantastic, and rarely told). Anyway, back to the steep hill.
So, we carefully make our way down to maingate. Just before that though, I heard some noise and saw a path…someone said it was A-camp(alcohol camp)….I was stunned. I didn’t have to walk thru the gauntlet? I’d heard stories and was not looking forward to that, but they were off the path, in the woods. So, we get to main gate/trail and find out there is no MAIN CIRCLE… …which is where I’d planned to plop myself until I found the kids. So I try instead for Kiddie Village, knowing there are 2 toddlers with my group. I don’t know how a wheelchair could have traversed the 6-8 inch mud of the trails, let alone the spiral down after the roadblock.
So, we’re heading for Kiddie Village & I tell this Brian guy that he can stay in our camp until he finds his friend. Every hippy we pass can see the exhaustion on my face and they say….not much further sister! We cross a hippy made bridge across a creek, beautiful flat rocks perfectly positioned and balanced. Down a ways, I see these 2 hippys ahead of me & say, “If one more hippy tells me, it’s just around the corner, I’m gonna scream!” They laugh and ask where am I headed. Kiddie Village. “Oh no sister, you’ve gone way way too far!”
By now, my legs are carrying me by adrenaline power alone, and we turned around, back toward and across the creek, and on…….until……..Yea! A sign that says Kiddie Village! We turn into the path, get about 50 yards before I realize…holy crap, it must be a city in itself and I can see no signs of it. I step off the path, pull off all my bags, drop down in hopelessness, when a mama comes & offers the use of an empty tent to store our stuff while we search. Yea! Thank you sister! As they are throwing the bags in the tent, I remember something a guy from a rainbow posting group saying if I can’t find her, I should om.
So I’m sitting there on the side of the trail, face in my hands, using my mind to say ommmm Summer, George, ommmmm……..ommmmm Summer, George, ommmmm. Twice….that’s all I did my om sandwich, and I lift my eyes from my hands and see this baby being carried down the trail towards us. I’m 3 days no sleep, overheated and in pain, but I’m thinking,……that baby sure looks like Skyla…………….then I raise my eyes higher, and the eyes shining back at me in utter shock, are Sunrise’s eyes. Skyla’s mama. We both scream, she runs and we have this little cry/hug puddle. Oh ya, I forgot something…….these kids 9 adults and 2 toddlers, called me on a regular basis for weeks BEGGING me to come. I said I couldn’t combat the fear, so needless to say, she was truly in shock.
She’d come looking for food, which made no sense, as there was plenty at the camp. Yea for manifestation! So, back we go…..towards and across the creek AGAIN, and on…..until she runs into a camp and yells, “MUNCHERS, do I have a surprise for you!!!” In I walk, in a daze, and I see something flying toward me at incredible speed, it picks me up and spins me around, puts me down and down I go. Legs finally go out………………but it was GEORGE! Yea George!!!! And then this MASS of humans with bellybuttons pile on top of a huge hug puddle, with me inside. It was a very good moment in time.
Within an hour of my arrival, Wally was taking a leak 5-10 ft from camp, when a baby copperhead slithered between his feet. Hollers of snake and snake relocation were heard until the people who knew how, did indeed relocate it, as well as many others as the days went by. I had been under the impression that when huge amounts of people enter the forest, the wildlife tends to move away til the humans are gone. I would not have gone if I hadn’t believed that. I don’t know. It could still be true, but the rain added another factor/ingredient into the soup.
I decided right then and there that I would not consume enough water or food to warrant a trip off the path. I took one sip of water about every hour-2 hours, and ate a piece of raisin bread for breakfast and before bed. I am terrified of snakes. Unfortunately, all those one sips added up and occasionally I would have to urinate whether I wanted to or not, and I required help……snake watch. My family, however, forgot that they had begged me to come, and were gone most of the time. My legs were in such bad condition from the entry in, that I was pretty well confined to camp. On the one day that the trails dried, I was able to go beyond those camps 50 yards away.
Being stuck at camp pretty well sucked, when I was alone, but there were always hippys checkin out our tapestries just when I needed visitors. Clark gave out free reiki attunements, and when he wasn’t there, I would fill the inquisitive ones minds with what reiki was all about, which was ok, since I’m a reiki master myself. Also, we usually had food, or water or advils or batteries, or a shitter, you know, things people need in the woods. We received and gave, lots of kick downs, ie, we have plenty, you take some.
The hollers of nick at night…….you need a cigarette, I got a cigarette…you got a cigarette, I need a cigarette…..were heard on a constant basis, but only heard ….free zuzu’s in the woods……once. (candy or deep fried candy) There were plenty of…..We Loooooovvve You’s and lovin you’s. I never saw a 6-up after that damn roadblock, but did see some forestry people comin that far back. Never saw a problem tho. I never made it up to Oz, heard about the gymnastics required to get there. Still haven’t seen lovin ovens either. Gonna have to go to another gathering if I’m to eat any of that pizza I keep hearing all the raving about. Enjoyed an evening with Chai Bahai about 2012 and prophecy, considering I’ve been studying prophecy for quite some time.
I met many good kind people…hodgepodge, neighbor Lodi, ER guys, Jesus, Bub, Mountain, Brian, Paul, Roach……and Phat kids, I didn’t see, but they did some awesome kick downs, I heard. Oh ya, Auntie Em!!!!—-sister laid her stuff aside the trail and helped me get to where I was goin….wow. The healer on the 4th, which I’m not that far along yet, etc. And of course Kag was there as well as Elf, whom I know but haven’t seen since Ocala. The ER guys…had a marijuana camp, for those who were ill, and you were allowed to partake once a day. If I have forgotten to recognize anyone who helped, or kicked down, I won’t say sorry, cuz you’ll most likely respond with,…don’t be sorry…be silly! Or even the visitors who came simply to spread ideas, thoughts, energy or kindness. Thank you all.
I believe July 3rd was the dry day. It was great, I kept asking, really, it’s dry? Finally I got out and found out for myself, it was fairly dry…way easier to walk. It was also the beginnings of the arguments within camp. After all their begging, they were rarely there, and couldn’t understand that I couldn’t walk where they wanted to go. My daughter even pulled the….argue for your limitations, you keep them, line. Sometimes I had to hold my urine for 8-10 hours til one of my girls would come back to camp. Yes, I’m that terrified of snakes!
But the biggest reason for the argument was cuz she was leaving. I’m there like 2 days…got 5 left….and she’s leaving…not even staying for the 4th! ….I said no….then finally she gets me ok with it….then I find that she’s taking George and Amasa with her! These are the 3 kids that I know well. The others I’ve only been around a week or 2 at my house, and 2 others I’d just met when I arrived. So, I blew! Came pretty darn close to a full blown panic attack, but I got it under control. I cussed ’em all for even considering leaving me in the woods with virtual strangers, after begging me to come, and walked out of camp.
I headed to trade circle. I wanted to be ANYWHERE but there, in my camp. I tried to make it down to trade circle, but saw a rather nasty fight/argument, that involved a big knife & I turned around. I didn’t know what lay ahead of the camp with the knife argument, so I turned back. I made my way to the new ER and asked permission to chill there to calm down. Dude says, hon, this is a free zone, you just set yourself down as long as you want. And I did. I sat there for 3 hours! Barely said a word, and even think I achieved invisibility for a brief moment. (Red Elk, on prophecy keepers.com said it was possible, but very difficult) (If you think I’m looney, then you must think the Native Americans or the Mayans, etc., looney as well, I don’t thiiiink soooo.)
This all gets confusing cuz hippy’s don’t like to know what time it is. I don’t wear a watch so my only connection to time was my cellphone, which by the way, NEVER did get beyond one bar. Anyway, suffice it to say, that Summer & I argued on Tuesday, had a blowout on Thursday and another on Friday morning before she left. The middle one included the entire family, the blowout….I’m darn near panic attack, someone is yelling, “George, do something”, others start omming, then the RAIN hits, and I mean rain. Amasa starts chanting something she just learned that she says means protection, but sounds a lot like……..bring the rain to me, bring the rain to me, and it pours harder. Needless to say, the argument was over. Life/nature/creator had intervened. But I’ve jumped ahead again.
Bad guys. Ok.. There’s this guy who comes into camp and does a few helpful camp type things, then offers massages, free for the taking. Girl 1 gets a massage. Gets up, moves away and girl 2 takes her place on the Astroturf. Gets a massage, gets up, moves away and girl 3 takes her place on the Astroturf. Gets up, moves away and poof, guy disappears. 2 seconds later, girl 1 says that guy felt me up…girl 2 me too! Girl 3 me too! By this time, mystery guy had already gone down the trail, or even this decrepit mama woulda gone after him! I couldn’t believe the mentality that allowed someone to be molested, yet watch it happen repeatedly without saying a word. Neither one of the 3 said a word. Amazing! I was practically fit to be tied, but he was gone! But I let the girls have it! “What do you mean letting him molest another girl once you knew what he was about?” Kids.
Somewhere during this time, I began asking for someone to make me a walking stick. Nothing happened. Then, I began asking people on the trail where they got theirs, was someone making them? The answer was always one of 3: I made it myself, I brought it with me, and I don’t know. It was starting to hit me, that no matter who I was, or wasn’t, or what shape I was in, I was on my own…unless I was willing to take the help of strangers. In Babylon, as the rainbows call the real world, I am unwilling to ask assistance. In the woods…with the rainbow….I was able. And was given. Except for the walking stick, which I really needed to get thru the mud. So, I decided to manifest it myself. As you will see……..
So, I wake up on the 4th to the sound of silence…oooh, remember that song? It was awesome. We’re talking 7-8 am, til noon thirty hippy time. Silence. Sure, there were a few sounds, dogs, babies, children, whispers, but for the most part, it was purely and soundly incredible. To have 5-6000 people keep quiet for 5 or more hours! It was my first, so it was/is special. As I peek out of my protective little tent, I see babies getting dressed already, at 8am. The mamas then ran for breakfast, and then we all headed for the place…I had no idea where. I knew there was no meadow, had been told one would be handcut…anyways, I begin the long trek back towards and across the creek…all the way to the T or Y at frontgate. Before we get there, however, my legs are already giving out when an obvious healer stops me and sends energy to my legs. It worked and, we took the left at the Y and walk til I see this incredibly beautiful bridge. I’ve never seen anything like it and unfortunately, didn’t get a picture, but it appeared to be made of mud, and it crossed one section of the river that I was seeing for my first time.
We cross the beautiful bridge & I’m perfectly happy with that, but Summer wants me to go with her….so I try to follow, til I see her across, on the what is now being called main circle island…..she tells me to walk across the river…not! She says go up the hill then….and around…I say…not! Then here comes the healer guy(sorry, don’t remember your name, if you told me) and he hears this mother/child thing going on…she wants me to be a part of her thing….I want to be in the shade and walk little…….so, he offers to help me up the hill. He’s carrying what I think is a walking stick, and he hands it to me & I use it, along with his helping hand, to get up the hill, then around, and onto the island. Then he’s gone.
So, I’m on this rock island and I go up to the tiny circle of people sitting around the peace pole, next to my daughter, and I sit as well. She’s tickled pink that I made it. I couldn’t remain there long however, because the rocks we were sitting on were so hot, I assured her I would still be close to the pole, which she felt was important, but I needed the shade. I simply went to the closest foliage and ducked under to wait for the circle to begin to form. There were many people huddled under the life/shade providing leaves. The silence, from breakfast til now, was awe inspiring. Seriously folks, to reiterate, we’re talking 5-6000 people! Silent! For hours! Well, the circle never really was a circle, because of the terrain, it was more like a snake. Some people were in the river to form the line. Finally, it’s time, so I come out from under my bush and join the circle. Most hands were connected, but I know of one break for certain.
Then the omming begins. So softly at first, as to almost be a hum, then it slowly gains in vibration and strength. As I’m omming, tears begin streaming down my face and continue the entire time.(as they once did in Sedona, as I saw the construction/destruction of a sacred place) I’m holding hands on both sides, so can’t just wipe em away…..I had no control, they poured, and along with the tears, it seemed my strength was going with them. I joined the two hands I was holding, stepped back to take a picture to remind me of the beauty of the moment, then retook my place. Don’t worry, I remained right behind them, to hold my space. Apparently, the kiddie parade had made it to the inner sanctum of the circle and this huge cry goes up, along with the hands, to the sky! Words do not accurately describe the beauty of mass prayers for peace.
The celebration begins, songs are sung, drummers are drumming, and people are dancing. I find Summer dancing by the pole, and I join in the song…..earth my body, water my blood, air my breath, and fire my spirit. I am not a good singer and usually very shy, but found myself singin as loud and strong as I could. I wandered around a bit, took a few pictures of the pole alter and found myself next to the river. I was over heating and knew it, so I splashed the cool river water on my face, wrists and on top of my head. As I stand, a young gal says here mama, this is for you, and hands me a purple woven bracelet. For years I’ve noticed the phenomenon of things dropping off me, usually jewelry….to make way for something new. Two days before I left for the gathering, my blue beaded bracelet, which I’d worn for a year, fell off. Makin my way up the rainbow ladder of insight and wisdom, ie next rung, (is my take)….purple replacing blue.
By now my body is covered in thousands of little red dots. I’m still breathing ok (emphesema wise), but my body is getting very weak. I head to the other side of the island, where the foliage is, and I duck in again. I rest, then go back into the fray…..meet Summer and she decides I need some of the watermelon that is being served…..somewhere. The water in my bottle is practically boiling, and the river water, however wonderfully cool, was not drinkable straight from the source. We find the watermelon, I get a tiny piece, head towards my bush and devour it. Oh my God was it good! It was exactly what I needed, only, I could tell….it wasn’t enough. So I head back to the watermelon and there’s my Summer, doing watermelon duty, slicing and giving. I ask if there’s enough for me to have another piece and she hands me this big ole hunk, I murmer my thanks and stagger back to my bush.
Had to move to another bush tho, cuz they were setting up a hose to cool people down, like a shower….so I go down aways and plunk myself down and begin to eat this chunk of watermelon like I’m a starving cro-mangnon. Once again, I take it to the bitter green rind, but this time, it is enough. It cooled me down and watered me to the point of functionality again. That’s when healer guy finds me and joins me and does some more healing. I ask, where’s your pretty walkingstick? He says, that was no walking stick…..that was a magic wand! Didn’t you see all the crystals? Yes, I had. It was absolutely gorgeous….and there I’d been, using it to walk. No wonder I made it up that hill! Thanks again, precious healer.
That’s when George finds me and I told her I wasn’t about to try the hill again…..let’s just walk across the river, kneehigh moccasins & all. (They were finally dry) So, arm in arm, we managed to get across and get cool at the same time. She then strips her clothes off & jumps in the river with the other swimmers. As I sit there on this huge rock a tiny pale blue butterfly lands on my boot and begins to drink. He drinks for about 30 minutes, then when I tell George to look, here comes another butterfly who lands on my other boot to drink. As usual, I say, hello beautiful. Then this young hippy starts eyeing my utensils………he’s got this tall thin plastic container of food, it won’t shake out and his fingers won’t reach the food. So, sure, I offer them up…hobo tool, all in one…….he eats, rinses and returns them. That is the essence of rainbow….need exchange, or more simply, needs met, and spirit everywhere.
After we all meet up on that big flat rock, they decide to do the 3 hour yoga thing, again, which is …..just up the hill…ya right! See ya back at camp! They went up, while I went on alone to camp. It was later(after we arrived home, on purpose) that I was told that I walked thru A-camp, on the way in and out from the river. No harm, didn’t even notice. But woulda been scared goin alone, had they told me, which is why they didn’t tell me. Worked out, but was a risky choice.
Back on the main trail, I’m walkin and walkin and I realize that I’m alone. Noone comin in either direction. I stopped. It felt really weird to be standing alone in the forest, knowing I really wasn’t alone, but couldn’t even hear anybody. It was then that I look down, and there laying alongside the trail….is my walking stick! I knew it! There wasn’t a soul in sight. I picked it up and said thank you, thank you, thank you!!! I decorated it with exotic yarns that I’d brought for trade, so no one would mistakenly burn it. Dry wood was in high demand! Poor Jesus, we had successfully hidden the prized piece of wood he intended to carve into a pipe, but before he could get his tools out…..Amasa and Groundscore were breaking it up to throw in the fire, before I could stop them! Fortunately, he was able to salvage one piece, after I yelled.
I’m not sure which night it was, but there seemed to be an excess of organic blue cheese. Groundscore tried 3 different recipes, and we hollered out…blue balls, who wants blue balls…………..uggh, they were horrible, but the people thought that was funny and came to the call and tried them anyway, and it seemed they were tolerable with a healthy dose of ranch dressing. But the pear pancakes were by far the best, and there was just enough syrup left in the bottle so that we all got a tiny bit on our first one. In the woods, when you’re really hungry, you take what you can get….but boy were those a treat!
There is a part of this story that I neglected to tell in the beginning, but it is integral, so……as hubby and I are loading the truck, I walk out on the porch, and my dog runs ahead of me, onto the grass. There, I see the S shaped figure of a snake …..——-/”’ Kinda like that, you know, ready to strike, or simply lookin…who knows. I didn’t even freak, simply called Blue, he came, went inside and told hubby. He didn’t kill it, it got away, “I said good, cuz I believe that snake was a sign/symbol for me, and you know it means transformation, so I’m glad it lived.” Somehow, I KNEW, and I carried that image/energy with me, as well as one tiny snake vertebrae in my medicine pouch.
Things are going well for me at this point. I’ve had a really special sacred day, the 4th, and it didn’t rain much at all that day. Now is when I tell you my favorite part of the story….also the smallest. Fireflies! Lightning bugs, glow bugs…whatever you know them by, they were there in the thousands, maybe more! For most people, that may be no big deal, but they happen to be one of my all time favorite creatures, loved from childhood on. Every year after we moved onto this land, I would chart when I saw the fireflies, so rare to me. Not only that, but I had once written a poem called Fireflies, and it was like the fireflies were good memories…about a year later, in the dead of winter, very late at night, I’m heading into one of my depressions and I ask outloud, “Are all my fireflies gone?” It was a double edged question….I had NOT seen the fireflies that year! And also, my good times, as referred to in the poem. Moments after I asked, there, on my window appears a firefly. In the dead of winter, and all I did was ask. Ok ok, you got it out of me….I asked it to flash 3 more times, to prove I really saw it.
Now you get the idea? I just love fireflies and to see them everywhere, every single night, was…………………….? No description is good enough. So, starting from night number one, the gathering was GREAT for me, no matter what happened! No hardship I faced came even close to making it a waste of my time. Nothing could erase that memory from me. I sat there night after night, staring into the darkness, trying to identify the colors, so I could paint the scene when I got home. I kept wondering how come it looked so dark and scary that first night we tried to drive up, when now, I swear the sky is periwinkle. At midnight. A periwinkle sky, dark tree trunks, dark foliage, and neon green stars from ground to sky. They did look like stars….beautiful green stars. The kids said the fireflies would fly in front of them to light their way back to camp every night. (Most hippies call flashlights…..hippy mace, cuz it blinds ’em temporarily, til the flashlight offender is long gone) I Cannot tell a lie…I am a flashlight offender!
The reason I wanted the firefly story in the middle, is as a buffer. Something soft, to place against the hard, which was about to come. The ‘blowout’ that I spoke of earlier.
Ok, so we’re up to Thursday, which was when I blew about Summer leaving and taking the other girls with her, and her lack of care, where her mother, an elder, was concerned. All of their lack of care. I just was dumbfounded. None of the kids understood, or said they didn’t, for Summers sake, which is when I cussed em and left, as I said earlier. I was feeling invisible, and was repeating it over and over, trying to come to terms with it. Not by the rainbow family, per say, but my tiny little rainbow family. I’d been invisible my whole life and thought these kids felt differently about me. This is what it felt like……come on out, we need you, please, please come….and then, oh wow, you’re here, you and your fears and extra needs, oh well, fend for yourself. I was also questioning Spirit, wondering WHY, WHY did he want me to come, why had he given me the rainbows? What about the snake, what was I supposed to learn here. Was it all, simply for the fireflies?
After I left and chilled for 3 hours, I came back and we had a little council. I tried to explain and they tried to listen. By this time, I was letting anyone take me to pee……….I know, I know, what the heck was I doing there? Once, I had 2 snake watchers, Elf and Fern, and I squatted there and cried, but had no urine to pass. Elf told me he understood anxiety and it was ok, I was ok. I think it was later that evening, alone, when I just got mad enough to go pee by myself, and I’m thinking about my S shaped snake at home, protecting me….and I squat down, saying….BITE ME! See, anger overcomes the fear, if you can get angry enough. It’s a simple process of changing out emotions. Process simple….achieving strong enough alter emotion, not so easy. So, what looks like a snake, crawls like a snake, may be……..a brand new 24 oz. box of Courage Builder, vitamin Look at Yourself, added.
And what you experience as disregard, may be………..An 8 oz bottle of urine flavored………..Release of Expectations, with a dr. approved added dose of…….Take back your Power! So, you see, nothing is bad. It’s all in how you perceive it, and how you later see it thru hindsight, which will usually fill in all the details you missed…the why did that happen, type details. So, the tiny family was smooth again, cept me and Summer, when we find out that Summers car is broke, dead broke, in town. Some of the kids left to get ALL THEIR BELONGINGS out of the dead car.
Groundscore, bless his heart, tried night after night to get a fire going with wet wood, but on this, what ended up the last night, George did the fire and wow, she’s good. We then strung up all the wet clothes and blankets that had gotten so wet during the deluge. Wet people saw the fire and came to get dry. The rain continued all night, and the kids who had left to get the stuff out of the car made it back about 1am. They said there were guys with ropes helping people get across the creek that was now like a raging river. For someone like me, that means….trapped! Summer never came back that night, so I had to believe she was smart enough not to try to cross. When I wake up in the morning, Summer has obviously made it across the creek, and she’s leaving and she wants my sleeping bag…since I had promised it to her as her birthday present when I was done at the gathering.
I wasn’t to be picked up until the next morning, IF my husband can make it, or it could even be another week. I’m inside it, in my pj’s, and she wants it. She offers me her wet unknown bag, not MY bag that she’d been using for a year. She was truly serious. We argued. We have an odd mother/daughter relationship….., she’s mad, I’m mad, so I crawl out of it & throw it at her. She says thank you, then asks for something else…I say sarcastically, take it baby, what else do you want? That was how we said goodbye. She took her shiny new Zero degree sleeping bag & slid her happy butt up the trail and out of the forest, and all the way to Kentucky.
That did it for me. I am outta here. I’ll hitchhike if I have to! I began throwing everything into bags, walked out of my tent and said…I’m goin. Amasa and George were going back to Texas with me, to get Amasa’s car, so they scurry to pack, ya right…hippys don’t do anything fast. It took hours! Since we’re all packing out at once, cept for the clean-up crew, I find myself once again carrying out everything I packed in, with the exception of the 4 lb each sleeping bag and tent. Fern wanted the tent for clean-up. I also donated the rest of the batteries & lighters, etc. So, at least this time I don’t have a ton of flashlight batteries and now I have my trusty new walking stick.
The creek was raging, but they had rebuilt the rocks to come above the water, so ropes were no longer needed. Way down the lane, this elder, a woman, stops this guy behind me, who I didn’t even realize was there, and she says, “How old are you”, 24 maam, “well, then you are old enough to know to help a lady out, pick up one of her bags!!! I’m smiling and rotating between thanking her, and saying sorry, to him. What a gas! I still chuckle at the memory of that poor guys face, as he’s being chastised! Needless to say, he carried my bag, even offered to carry em all, but I wouldn’t let him, til we got to Wally’s truck. Thanks again, dude.
They had parked the truck during the deluge the night before, in a little creek. We thought it would be easier to get it out without any weight, so we stayed outside the car. People come to help push and then it becomes evident…he can’t stop…he must keep going up the steep muddy hill, else slide down. We watch with stunned faces, our vehicle going up up up and around the mountain. As we start the walk up, some lady decides to park right where the cars are having to gas it or slide down… as this causes commotion, she yells, I’m parking here! Then there’s this chorus of…OH NO YOU’RE NOT PARKING THERE LADY…..over and over, as these men storm towards her. She finally gets the hint and drives off. She was seriously putting many people in danger, but it was handled.
Ok. WALKING back up the hill, with a walking stick was a bit of a help, then I see George, telling me…get in this lady’s car, she’s gonna drive you to the truck! Yea George! Yea Lady! After I was dropped off, we all hop into Wally’s truck and George decides that now is a good time for Elf to learn to drive the stick shift truck, on the windy mountain roads, since he has to return after he has dropped us off at a hotel, since he’s part of clean-up crew. Oi ve! That went quite badly….it starts to sprinkle, and he’s gassing it for curves…I’m yelling to slow down, he’s yellin at me, and George is taking the middle ground cuz she agrees with me, but he needs to learn, she tells me later. Elf is usually very gentle and quiet… what fun! (Seriously, I’m smiling)
Somehow we survive the spin around the mountain and arrive at the super8, which is where I expected to find hubby later that night….so he didn’t go all the way out there to get me. I call, and he’s standing at the best western across the street. Had arrived the day before!!! Was awaiting my call…which couldn’t call, remember, no signal. So, yea, there’s Blue too! Hubby got the girls a room of their own, we ordered pizza, then we all had a few beers, raged at the memories, then slept.
Left at about 10am and lost 1 hour off driving time…(love it when that happens…time warps) hmmmm, while traveling with very slow hippys, who like to stop constantly, and who meander in the stores, and in the bathroom….(we think someone missed a water jug when treating with GSE, ie. Grapefruit seed extract, to clean the creek water). We’re about 30 minutes from home and I say, “Do you guys realize that, I think, this is the first gathering without a rainbow? The kids were saying, no, really? When hubby points to the sky…………wala, a rainbow!
For all the diehard rainbows out there who may be reading this, who have gone to many gatherings,…. even people who fear snakes or have bellybuttons! Each gathering I go to, I learn. Each gathering I go to, I get stronger. Each hardship is eloquently disquised, but is a lesson, a piece of wisdom, to store for future use, or to pass on as needed. For example, here is one example of faith, in disquise, dressed in a coat of humidity. My first night there, at bedtime, it rains and this humidity drops down on us like a big heavy quilt, and I can’t breathe. I’m knowin that my inhaler isn’t gonna do the trick this time, so I talk to Creator……”OK, if it was your intention to get me here, to die here, that’s fine. I’m truly ok with that. But if it is NOT your intention, then you might wanna reconsider this humidity, cuz I’ll be dead soon, without breathing. Humidity gone. Poof.
As for the troubles with my personal rainbow family, it seems the car situation has split them up. I am still in contact with my daughter, she calls on a regular basis. I love her dearly. What I learned, after much analysis, is that the Big family, gave to me, as a gift….whereas, my kids……felt only obligation. The strangers were not obliged to help me, but they did, maybe because they didn’t have to….maybe it’s the choice that matters in the end. The kids, felt no obligation, til I asked for it, then I was no longer a gift, but someone they were now obliged to think about. I learned, that in the end, it is up to me. If I need help, I must seek it out, not just expect it to be at the corner store. (the kids) Life is learning, and I’m learning as fast as I can. My life story is proof that I came to learn, but it is obvious I am not wise enough yet. By the way…..this hermit is in the process of buying an RV. Who said the gathering sucked? Obviously, the ones who were not healed, lifted, or taught important lessons.
THE END of Rainbow Gathering 2007, my experience/movie